This year is so young, it’s barely got its eyes open yet. We’ve already seen a mediocre State of the Union address, and an uninspiring and uneventful Golden Globes and Grammy Award Ceremonies. On the road approaching the Academy Awards (oh, it’s coming!), we start to look back on the good-to-pretty good movies of 2009. But that’s a mistake!
We’ve already seen those movies. We know who’s going to win, probably…2009 is over, and it’s time we forget the movies it brought with it. It’s time to look ahead, to the future of cinema, and to the trash that Hollywood pushes on us at this juncture.
Red Riding–Looks like a worthwhile flick. Gritty, action packed, subtle…everything an indie film should be.
Repo Men—The concept was obviously ripped from the just-okay-rock opera Repo: A Genetic Opera, but it stars Jude Law and Forest Whitaker, so I’ll bite.
City Island—Can we please have an indie flick that’s not Juno? Juno was good–I liked it–but does every fucking independent movie have to be Juno?
Dear John—If The Notebook made you cry, then you probably shouldn’t see this movie. You should probably just stay in your apartment and play with your cats.
MacGruber—When Saturday Night Live used to make movies, they based them on time-honored skits by top-notch comedians. Now they throw together 2-second bits and shit out a blockbuster.
Bass Ackwards—I don’t understand art anymore. The title makes it seem like a fun and hilarious romp through goofsville, but the trailer shows me a weird, artsy, dramatic scenester clusterfuck.
Season of the Witch—Nicholas Cage and Ron Pearlman doing olde English accents is one of those things that should be filed under “NEVER LET IT HAPPEN AGAIN.”
Kick-Ass—If this movie turns out like I want it to, it will easily be one of my favorite movies of the year. Kick ass.
(return to MAIN PAGE)